There were five people aboard an airplane having engine
trouble getting ready to crash, however, there were only four parachutes.
Everyone wondered what should be done to determine who should get the
parachutes. One person said that he was the smartest thing that hit the face of
the Earth, and that he was too smart to die. So, he took one of the parachutes
and jumped out of the aircraft. The second person said that she was too
important to die, she had children and a family to take care of, and they
depended on her to care for them. So, she took one of the parachutes and jumped
out of the aircraft. The third person said that he was too important to die
because his family depended on him for survival. He was the head of household
and the sole bread winner. So, he took one of the parachutes and jumped out of
the aircraft. Finally, there were only two people left, and one parachute. One
person was a 12 year old boy, and the other was a 65 year old man. The old man
said, "Well son, I have lived a good life, and you are too young to die,
you have a long life ahead of you. So, you take the last parachute. The boy
asked, "Why, Sir?" The old man said, "Well, there is only one
parachute left." The little lad said, "Sir there are really two
parachutes left." The old gentlemen asked, excitedly, "Yeah?
How?" "Well," replied the boy, "you know that guy who thought
he was the smartest and greatest thing that hit the face of the Earth? He
grabbed my backpack."
A little boy goes to his dad and
asks, "What is politics?" The dad says, "Well son, let me try to
explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me
capitalism. Your mother, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call
her the government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you
the people. The nanny, we'll consider her the working class. And your baby
brother, we'll call him the future. Now, think about that and see if that makes
sense." The little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said.
Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on
him. He finds that the baby has soiled his diaper. The little boy goes to his
parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he
goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and
sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed. The
next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I
understand the concept of politics now." The father says, "Good son,
tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about." The
little boy replies, "Well, while capitalism is screwing the working class,
the government is sound asleep, the people are being ignored and the future is
in deep shit."
A Bible group study leader says to his group, “What would
you do if you knew you only had four weeks left before the great Judgment Day?”
A gentleman says, ”I would go out into my community and minister the Gospel to
those that have not yet accepted the Lord into their lives.” “Very good!” says
the group leader. One lady speaks up and says enthusiastically, “I would dedicate
all of my remaining time to serving God, my family, my church, and my fellow
man with a greater conviction.” “That's wonderful!” the group leader comments.
One gentleman in the back finally speaks up loudly and says, “I would go to my
mother-in-laws house for the four weeks.” The group leader asks, “Why your
mother-in-law’s home?” “Because that will make it the longest four weeks of my
life!”
Source : Funny
Jokes
